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How to eat with a scissors |
For many years I eat with cutlery, knife, fork and spoon. I mean, even more than one of each. Tea spoon, table spoon, you know what I mean.. Now my life is easier; I only eat with scissors, one scissors, a pair of scissors, both halves of scissors. Are they singular or plural anyway?
Is this a joke? No, no, they really work! Try it, get out your scissors and start eating. Open them slightly for a scoop affect, squeeze them very gently for a tong affect. Want to cut sometimes? Who needs a knife ¨C just flail away cutting to your hearts content with your¡ you got it..,scissors. Sometimes my right hand gets tired, then I grab my scissors with both hands.
I take them with me to Chinese restaurants. They think I¡¯m cool. Some people use chop sticks, some a regular knife and fork but no one else uses a scissors. I bring a bright red pair. Once this Chinese guy asked me if I had an extra pair of scissors on me. I didn¡¯t but I let him use mine for awhile The kitchen was pleased to wash them for me.
Scissors as an eating utensil is very romantic for a candlelight dinner. We each hold a side and eat off the scissors at the same time. It¡¯s a precursor to a French kiss.
But I just don¡¯t eat with a scissors, I cook with one. I cut vegetables, cut toast, scramble eggs, stir fry, mix, I do just about everything with a scissors.
I love my scissors and my scissors loves me. They have never let me down. They do a phenomenal job if you talk to them. I find that they like certain phrases such as ¡°pretty scissors¡± and ¡°want to go for a walk?¡±
Let me know how it goes with your scissors. May we could start a blog, a fan club, a forum, a focus group. We will then be in a position to organize a cruise and have seminars.
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